Super DC - The Uncollected Text Adventures : Super DC #9 "Microbe Man"

Finally, the winners are announced for the competition, originally run in Super DC #4, calling for readers to send in their suggestions for new Batman foes. I've been keeping an eye out for this one. Says Super DC's editorial figurehead The Skipper, "There was the fire-breathing Monster Man, the Wasp (with motorized wings), The Weather Man (who can cause freak weather), the Cobbler (equipped with lethal boots), the Fly, Chain Man, Mr. Magnet, Queen Cobra, Magic Woman, Captain Cutlass and many more besides."

Judges ultimately awarded a transistor radio to Roger Purnell of Kirkham for The Impersonator, a villain who disguises himself as and simulates the modus operandi of established Batman villains like The Penguin, et al. Personally, I think there's something to The Cobbler.

Other features in Super DC #9 include profiles of Patrick McGoohan, Trevor Howard (focusing on his love of cricket), a two-page feature on the QE2, a telling of the events of the first-ever Isle of Man TT motorcycle race in 1907, and a partial dictionary of the Mangani language -- the dialect of the apes from Edgar Rice Burroughs' Tarzan series of books. There's also a troubling article on the sale of several fighter planes from 1969's Battle of Britain to a Texas-based organization called The Confederate Air Force. They changed their name in 2002.

In their text adventure, Batman and Robin battle Catwoman -- or a very well disguised Impersonator -- in "The Feline Felon."

The following adventures are reprinted in Super DC #9:
The Super-Duel in Space Action Comics  #242 (July 1958)
The Dreams of Doom! Superboy #83 (September 1960)
The Kryptonite Girl! Superman's Girl Friend, Lois Lane #16 (April 1960)
The Challenge of Clay-Face Detective Comics #298 (December 1961)
The Brain-Stealers! Action Comics #354 (September 1967)

This Issue's Text Adventure:

Superman faces his deadliest foe by a dam site. Doctor Herman Zeuss has perfected a formula which shrinks him to the size of a microbe and allows him to control the will of anybody that he ... uh ... gets inside of. 

Personally, I would've gone with "The Dowdy Man," which he is passingly referred to, over "Microbe Man," and probably would've had him emitting a cloud of mind-controlling microbes instead of becoming one himself. All of this Monday morning quarterbacking is in service of finding a path that does not terminate at the absolutely gross mental image of Superman inhaling a foe described as being "frog sized," and he's soaking wet. Sorry for the spoiler, but you're better off warned. 

And now, Microbe Man ...

* * *  

The Great Hall was packed with people. Superman stood behind a pillar at the back, and watched the Police Commissioner rise to speak. Above his head waved a banner: "Crusade Against Crime."

"Fellow citizens," he began. "There has been a threat against my life. But that only makes me more determined to -- aagh!"

The Commissioner clutched at his throat and sank to the ground. There was instant pandemonium. A great cry went up, and the audience surged forward, as if to try and help the Commissioner.

Superman launched himself into the air, swept over the heads of the crowd and landed lightly on the platform. ”Wait! Please sit down," he cried.

The sound of his voice and the sight of his red cape restored order. People sank into their seats. Ambulance men hurried on to the platform and lifted the unconscious Commissioner on to a stretcher. As they did so, Superman swept the Hall with keen eyes, checking his super-memory for any criminals.

He saw nothing to rouse his suspicion and raised a hand. "The meeting is over," he cried. "But the Crusade will continue. Whoever is responsible for this attack on the Commissioner -- I shall bring him to justice."

With a bound he reached the front entrance. But as the ambulance drove off, he lingered to watch the crowd emerging from the Hall.

The sad bewhiskered face of a dowdy little man caught his keen eye. "Strange" he mused. "I did not see him when I scanned the audience."

He turned to a policeman, "Officer, will you follow that little man and check him out for me?" he asked. "I wish to go with the Commissioner to hospital."

The policeman agreed and Superman leaped into the air. A few minutes later he was at the hospital, talking to the doctors. "A very puzzling case," said one. "The Commissioner would appear to have been the victim of some microbe attack."

Superman thanked him and flew back to police headquarters. The policeman who had followed the little man was waiting. "The guy checks out okay," said the policeman. "Name of Hyman Smith. A chemist. Clean record."

Superman frowned, "Thanks, officer," he said. 

But at the moment, Hyman Smith was chuckling with satisfaction. "I fooled everyone," he said. "Even Superman! Even he would never dream of anyone being able to turn himself into a microbe!"

He opened a cupboard in the corner of his dingy bedroom and from a row of bottles and phials selected a tube of red liquid. He measured out a quantity. "'Once more I shall shrink to a microbe!" he gloated.

At the same time a sudden thought jumped into Superman's mind. "That dowdy little man with the whiskers! My super-memory has just recalled his name, it is not Hyman Smith – it's Herman Zeuss! I sent him to jail 10 years ago."

Superman went speeding like a bird back to the offices of the Planet. In a deserted spot behind the building, he switched back to his role as a mild-mannered reporter. He hurried into the building and went at once to the files where clippings of past news stories were kept.

He was thumbing through the ones he sought when cub reporter Jimmy Olsen dashed up. Clark looked thoughtfully at the clippings. "Jimmy you were with Superman the day that he captured Herman Zeuss in that criminal laboratory of his, weren't you?"

Jimmy nodded proudly. 'I sure was, Clark."

"Didn't Zeuss make some kind of fantastic boast?"

"Sure!" said Jimmy, "He said something about being on the verge of a discovery that would shrink a man to the size of a microbe. He was nuts of course!" 

Clark Kent's eyes gleamed. "Be a pal, Jimmy and put these clippings away for me. I've got something to check on – urgently!"

He drove to the dingy rooming house where, the police had told him Hyman Smith was living.

As he climbed the uncarpeted staircase, he said to himself: "I had better remain Clark Kent, reporter. If my theory proves correct, the sight of Superman would prompt Zeuss to shrink to microbe size-and even my super-vision might be unable to detect him."

He knocked on the door of Zeuss's room. There was no answer. Using his super-strength, Clark pressed the door, and it flew open. Herman Zeuss stood facing him, and holding a gun. "I know you! You're Clark Kent, the reporter," said Zeuss. "You're just in time to help me with an experiment. Sit down in that chair while I tie you up."

Clark allowed himself to be trussed. Then Zeuss produced a phial of red liquid. "You are looking at the most amazing discovery in the history of mankind," he gloated. "I am going to shrink myself to the size of a microbe! Then I am going to enter your brain, and make use of your body for a while!"

He tipped the phial, drank its contents, and before the reporter's incredulous gaze, he began to shrink rapidly. Soon there was nothing left to see!

Clark did not have long to wait before he sensed the presence of the microbe-size scientist within his brain. "You will do exactly as I tell you, Kent," was the message he received. A few minutes later, he was driving towards the outskirts of Metropolis. The reporter was instructed to leave his car close to the great Metropolis Dam and to take from the car a plastic bomb device.

He walked to the dam wall, and heard Zeuss instruct him, "Walk out along the wall until you reach the centre. There you will fasten the bomb to the wall and set the timing device for 10 minutes."

Clark did as he was bidden. When he had completed the task, he was not surprised to hear Zeuss declare, "Now you are no more use to me. Jump – so that they will find your body in the pool below, after the explosion."

Clark obediently leaped from the wall. Down he plunged towards the white foaming waters at the foot.

"Ah! Herman seems to have vacated my brain," he thought. He made a lightning switch in mid-air, and as Superman swooped back towards the top of the dam. He looked towards his car. Zeuss was about to drive away.

When the car was out of sight behind the power-station buildings, Superman snatched the plastic bomb. With one minute to go before it exploded, he launched himself upwards beyond Earth's atmosphere. The plastic bomb burst harmlessly in space as he tossed it away. He headed back to Earth.

Zeuss stared at the Man of Steel with disbelief in his eyes. "Not you again, Superman! Just in my moment of triumph."

As if something had snapped within him, the mad scientist broke down. He buried his head in his trembling hands.

"Stop!" cried Superman, snatching away the other's hands. A tiny phial, half full of red liquid, fell to the ground. "Too late, Superman!" screamed the scientist.

He began to shrink - but not to microbe size. Having managed to drink only half the phial, his size was reduced only to that of a frog.

Superman made a grab but Zeuss dodged behind a clump of rocks.

Again Superman pounced. But his adversary was not to be caught so easily. With a splash, he dived into the dam.

Superman took a deep breath. "You have made a mistake, Herman," he said. "I can use my super-breath to suck all the water out of the dam." 

The smooth waters boiled up into a water-spout which vanished into his mouth and within minutes the limp figure of his miniature enemy was in his hands.